Jimmy Carter once said that he never lost his temper. The interviewer challenged him; “You mean you were never angry with your children?!” Carter replied, “I didn’t say I wasn’t angry. I said I never lost my temper. There’s a difference.”
My wife taught me not to yell at our children, except in the rare circumstance that they were about to put themselves in danger. When they walk into a dangerous street, then yell! And they will notice and respond, because they never hear yells.
One time I caught my (then) 5-year-old daughter writing on a table top. I said to her, sternly (but not yelling), “what are you doing!?” She looked up at my face, burst into tears, and ran to her mother. “Mommy! Daddy just yelled at me!”
This example illustrates what we learned. When you don’t yell, your children become sensitized to facial expressions, to body language, to tone and emphasis. And that is an invaluable skill for them to have.
By Richard Muller on Quora.
I realise something
I once I visited a mzungu friend who lives in the west . Having dinner all he talked to his wife and kids was the great people he met at work ,how he helped his boss solve a problem , how he will be able to make more deals tomorrow,even if he had a bad day he will focus more on what went good during the day …
Then last year I visited a friend who works for one of leading bank in Kenya . Having dinner with family and kids all he was complaining about is how demeaning his job was ,how his employer has refused to give him a pay rise ,how he can’t wait to quit his job after failing to secure a deal in forex exchange …
Picture this ,when these kids from two families constantly hear their parents: talk good about their job-mzungu, and the other one who talks negative about his job( Kenyan parent) ,grow up which kid will have a high chance of positive attitude towards work and life? That’s what makes a difference between wazungu and us.
Ati oprah was telling parents, look into your child direct in the eye and tell them to apologise after a mistake!! They should feel sorry!
Sasa fanya hivi, mtoi wako akilose pesa ya fees kwa sportpesa, pesa ulichukua loan kwa sacco, kindly look them in the eye and tell them to say “pole daddy”.
Hahaha!! Mboroshiet!!! Mtoto lazima akemewe na atandikwe slaps kadhaa ndio anyooke. If it werent for your strict parents ungekuwa mwizi ama malaya sahii.
Ofcourse si wote. Si akina Kabura na Waiguru have parents too! My point are chances are high you will be a menace to the society if your parents werent strict.
There is a difference between man(husband) and woman(wife).
At any time in their lives, and as long thry have your DNA in them,kids SHALL know that"daddy sio mum". Period. Daddy has no faces to make,no affinity for shit whether a visitor is there or not…hot slaps are not kept for you,they are administered there n then. Daddy sio mum
What I learnt from my Dad is that kudeal na watoi ni kama kuadminister antibiotics. Dosage ya ukali depends on the offence. Kichapo ya Matha, however intense, would never be as frightening as that stern look from Dad (red eye reduction).
There are situations that meet the war threshold, lakini sio kila saa.
yenyewe is it only my case or most fathers rarely beat their kids as in corporal punishment? While still young, mother used to give us kichapo cha mbwa hadi you threaten her utatoroka uende kulala na watchman in his shed but it does not faze her while the Dad on the other hand never laid a hand on us, only threats and sanctions and they worked, I believe. But something funny when on the wrong you would prefer getting the mum’s dosage than mbuyu’s kikao