Copied
The difference between men and women is that men do not think of working as a thing they can choose not to do. They grow up with the understanding that they must work and they must make money.
For women, that isn’t always the case.
There are women who are so ambitious, so driven, and so committed to doing great things in this world. And they go ahead to do them regardless of who they are married to.
Case in point is Ed Sheeran’s wife.
She’s married to a famous musician and yet she’s been working in the corporate world for 9 years. She did not quit to be an influencer or a rich man’s wife. She’s kept a low profile and her name and it’s obvious that is a person who always wanted to work.
Another example is the spouse of Kalonzo Musyoka. I always thought the spouses of politicians always end up giving up their careers but I was surprised to learn that in all the years Kalonzo was an MP, minister and finally a VP in the grand coalition government his wife was working at CBK.
After I have been on social media long enough to hear women saying working is bad for their feminine energy, I have accepted the fact that it is not all women who dream of working, and that for some of them, they do not quit their jobs as a sacrifice for the man. Most times a marriage is usually their way out of employment.
That is; they hated employment and they only worked because they hadn’t met anyone willing to fund their “stay at home wife” dreams.
Ever since this ruling came out, there’s been a lot of talk about exploitation. While it is all valid, a conversation we can’t avoid is how we women are conditioned to look at work.
We might keep on talking about men asking their wives to stay at home and while that is true, another thing that is true is that a lot of women do not look at their careers as a necessity. They have the education but if they found the opportunity to be trophy wives, they would take it without much thought.
Until we get to a place where women internalize the fact that they are adults and working is not an option for adults, we are always going to have this conversation of “I gave up my career to support his dreams”
One thing I know for sure though is that women who truly love their careers do everything in their power to defend their careers and their financial independence. They even walk out of relationships and marriages for their careers.
Even in school, we had certain classmates, and from their ambition and drive, we could tell they were going to treat their careers as a priority. We also had others who treated school like a rite of passage and who couldn’t wait to get married because marriage was their greatest dream and a career was just a by the way.
If you have daughters, please tell them having a career is not negotiable. Meru mothers usually say, “your career/money is your first husband” and you have to have that before you get your second (which is a man)
If you raise your child thinking a husband is a non negotiable but their career is negotiable, best believe you will one day see them on social media saying working is bad for their feminine energy.
And the thing about this ruling is that it is not exploitative. It is actually very progressive because women now have their jobs, their businesses, their savings, and their bank accounts.
We imagine this ruling is only here to protect men but it is here to protect women as well.
Imagine dividing your money with an alcoholic ex who used to drink all his money away? Or the cheater who used to spend everything in his bank account on other women?
This ruling is only going to hurt people who want to live in the 1950s where it was normal for women to stay at home taking care of the children.
In this day and age, you can work. All you need is drive and ambition.
But if working is bad for your feminine energy, I don’t know what to tell you. God will see you through.
