Number 1,
Loliondo express
do you remember when kikuyus made millions on money by transporting fellow kenyans and her usual neighbors to Babu…at that time i was living in komarocks,and i remember 19-60 and 19-61 zikitransport watu at 7k one way flight,then they would come back with bottles of water and would sell a 250ml at 5k…andu a nyumba…wen i grow up,i want to be babu wa Othaya.
Number 2
Lema Ayanu
this crook fed on our food,he was given free air time on our national televisions,imagine he was a fraudster.
number 3
President Ole Bashir
do you remember during promagation of the new constitution…do u remember Balala walking in with Sudan President???then when evening came,cord ikaruka that haijawahi msikika…enyewe kenyans
The Amerucans present you with a winning ticket for 200k. They tell you that they don’t have bank account where the money can be transferred, so if it can be put in your account, they can give you 50k. But as a sign of goodwill, uwaachie Ile kitu uko nayo.
You do a quick calculation and realise unaweza wagonga hio 200k, so you gladly give them your phone and if you are more philanthropic like me, you add them 5k. You tell them to chill at uhuru park.
Ukifika KCS house, wanakuuliza. “umepatiwa na wameru?”
i clearly remember how my kaphone went…i had just joined college and my late bro. {rip curator} had given me 25k…i went and bought nokia 3310 at 9500.by then,i was living at kombo munyiri,kufika riverside i met a dirty looking “mmeru”,wacha nifurahi,imagine jamaa alikuwa na 100k ticket the issue was,hakuwa anajua pahali ofisi ziko, coincidentally i also did not know, he mentioned something to do with Hilton,nikashika radar,…wacha nipeleke jamaa,kufika kijana msafi nikadunga boy chai na andazi,jamaa akajifanya anaogopa hoteli coz yeye ni mmeru tu.in the back of my mind i knew i would make a minimum of 80k,jamaa ningempee 20k na fare…ukikuyu ukaamka
i noted jamaa was very excited na tall building,asking every building’s name,asking me how much further and so on. lastly tukafika,jamaa kuona kcs house akakataa kuingia,akanishow vile watu wanachukia wameru, akanituma niende niambie mkubwa akuje,lastly nikaingia box,i was given the ticket in agreement that i leave him with my phone…that was my last time to see my phone.
Back when I was in high school, I was going home for mid-term. I was seated at Hilton jobless corner waiting to be picked. An old guy approached me, seemingly confused, and told me that he was a taxi driver who had dropped off clients at Hilton, but they had forgotten a package in his car.
He showed me a tube full of “gold” pellets, labelled 24 CARATS, $1000. Alisema that he was confused because he couldn’t trace the clients, and was wondering what to do. I did a quick calculation, and the amount was 70-something thousand bob, and thought of buying the “gold” at a throwaway price, as he had hinted. Luckily enough, I was a broke high school kid and told him sina pesa. I guess some other fool got conned that day.
Ya donde pyramid ndio ilinikamata. Then there was ile ya machokosh tao especially around Tom mboya na Luthuli avenue ya kuuziwa tenje, ukifika mbele kumbe ni cover tu na matope ndani. I once fell for the trick na nikalambwa 5oo bob.