Psalm 16:8
English Standard Version
8 (A)I have (B)set the Lord always before me;
because he is at my(C)right hand, I shall not be(D)shaken.
Before Corona I was a religious lunch hour fellowship attendant. There was a message that never left me from the above verse. The speaker said, if you don’t want heartbreak, depression, high blood pressure and ulcers put the Lord ever before you. Not your husband, not even your children, the Lord.
Isaiah 26:3
New Living Translation
You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!
So today I was reading an article about Jane Mbuthia the headmistress who killed her husband. She says, she lost everything and I reflect alot on things. I started to think about when she actually lost everything, it wasn’t when she killed her husband or paid people to do it.
She lost everything, when she lost herself in the marriage, when Solomon Mbuthia became her god, her everything. I follow true crime ardently and I always wonder, at what point do you pass from adoring someone to start thinking about killing them. The person who you have kids with and slept next to each other for decades and invested together, now you want to kill them.
A case in point is Chris Watts who killed his 8 months pg wife and 2 toddler daughters and dumped their bodies in oil tanks. His daughters. I have watched so many home videos of him with those kids, he was an amazing dad. People think true crime buffs have a morbid obsession but mostly it is a passion because it makes you want to unravel and understand bizarre happenings. Why would a man kill his children he raised from birth. Sometimes you get so analytical that you forget that these are real people like you that this happens to.
In my assessment, the first point of trouble is when this person becomes your everything, the second point is when they start disappointing you and the third is when 3rd parties come in as an escape from your frustration and disillusionment with the relationship.
In the marriage of the Mbuthias as with the Morphew family in which Suzanne Morphew was murdered by her husband of 20 years, both were having affairs. I have followed so many of these murders, something diabolical enters the scene when affairs begin.
I can’t explain it but it’s like inviting Satan himself into the situation and all manner of bizarre things start to happen to people who for all intents and purpose were pillars of society who could not harm a fly. Demons are conjured. The psychic or soul wound opens the door to Satan, depression, suicidal ideation and ultimately murder.
Chris Watts says, he felt driven by a force to annihilate his family so that he could be with his mistress from work. He says, the day before he knew he’d kill his kids to the point that he told the school that they won’t be coming back. Mark you this is a guy who doesn’t even have a parking ticket to his name. Now his dropping the bodies of his kids into oil tanks so that he can start over with his mistress after strangling them. Chris Watts says, there was a point of no return. The music he even listened to that day was diabolical.
I know most people don’t believe it but Satan is very real and God has a hedge of protection over us that Satan cannot breach as per the story of Job until we ourselves make an opening for him. In the first murder, Cain gets jealous that God rejected his sacrifice and accepted that of his younger brother, God then goes to Cain and tells him, sin is crouching at your door it desires to possess you. The sin was the demon of murder. The entry point was the jealousy and anger. Without an opening the devil can’t touch you. Once the opening is there, the devil will come in with suicidal thoughts, murderous thoughts which after some time will reach a point of no return. Where you will do the unthinkable including killing your innocent children like Chris Watts did.
I learn alot from true crime, one thing I have learnt is that human beings are delicate creatures. Our minds, hearts and bodies are delicate so we must protect them because if we do not things can spiral out of control very fast. This has led me away from the casual attitudes people in this age have toward relationships. Do you think that if Chris Watts mistress from work knew that her affair with him would end in him killing his entire family and rotting in jail for the rest of his life she would have had an affair with him? I mean it looked completely harmless at the beginning. A man tired of his marriage and a woman who wanted him from work.
People think I am overly careful and conservative but it’s because I have seen how things that look like abit of fun can turn into your worst nightmare.
For sure Jane Mbuthia loved her husband and she put him first and when things stopped going her way and her husband started seeking solace from their crumbling marriage from their employees all hell broke loose in her heart and mind.
Unfortunately we don’t always have control of the direction our relationships will go in spite of our best intentions because it takes two to get it right. No matter what you do if the other person is not pulling their weight, the relationship will fail. Shannon Watts thought she could fix the marriage, Chris did not want to fix it, he wanted a tabula rasa, a fresh start with no baggage. In her gut she did not feel safe around him but she was pregno and she needed the marriage to work regardless of the angst she felt that was warning her that things had fallen apart.
One of the best things about being single is that you are totally in control of most everything in your life. When you are married, your health, future and happiness and even your life is in the hands of your partner literally. Being a tender hearted person I don’t want to be in that precarious situation where someone has so much power over me.
However there’s a way to self protect, all is not lost. Put the Lord ever before you. Give the throne of your heart to only God because He is the only immutable Being, everything and everyone is transient. They can be amazing and they die, what happens to you if you had made them your everything? You will be broken. If you don’t want to be so consumed that you turn into a Murderer put the Lord always before you.
Jane Mbuthia is right. She was a role model in society. She taught CRE. She loved her husband. How did she get into this free fall where she lost everything. She didn’t guard her heart and she didn’t put God always before her. As she serves her 15 years sentence let her understand that she still hasn’t lost God and that she can give Him His rightful place in the throne of her heart and He can restore what the legion destroyed in her life and her children’s lives. The only way she can conquer her demons is by putting the Lord always before her.