Excuse Me, my Conscious Speaking
Today I choose to get out, go to my friends,
To share a word or two
I convinced myself I was cool
“This is something I could do”
“I’m not a fool”
“I’m just not that cool”
So, out and about
Here I go
I reached their
There they are
Taking in the air
My heartbeat now higher
Worried
I might say something stupid
And look like a fool
So, I listened as they talked
To have the right response
They talked for a while
Still no clue
No words to respond
The silence set in
Without a word from me
Tension crept in
Crippling
My faith in me
Then, out I muttered a word
But none respond
Then I felt something
My conscious wondering
“They think I’m a fool”
Another friend came
Another conversation made
This time I listened carefully
Waiting for the right moment to cheap in
The right moment my idea to pitch in
The right moment to share my thoughts too
The right moment to say a word or two
I listened closely
Not to talk loosely
The talk went for a while
Still nothing to say
Tension set in
Pressure to cheap in
“Say something!”
“Don’t look like a fool!!”
The moment then came
Again it happened the same
I felt the previous shame
Said something stupid
“Now they think I’m a fool”
My mouth is now shut
My mind in deep thoughts
“This people don’t think I’m cool”
“They think I’m a fool”
There and then
I cede, out not to let a word
Until that day
When I’m ready and able
To voice
A point edible and sensible
Until then
I’ll stick to my pen
A bit if not for a while
With it, I can’t lie
With it, my thoughts can’t pry
It’s back to the drawing lines
This round I must make it right
Make it rhyme
Until its fine like wine
More than a dime
Talk out loud
Be that profound
Be that proud
Of my words no doubt