How to Build a successful startup in Kenya

Mkianza a start up company or an NGO and you need seed capital or funding, invest heavily in optics,for wealthy and upper middle class Investors presentation and image is key to your Success.Alafu your product ama service ikuwe hizi vitu za hewa zenye they never exist, have never crystallized and are not even on the elemental chart. Mnaeza sema mambo ya Global warming,using renewable energy is more profitable than fossil fuels ama mseme nowdays Jua imeshuka kidogo ndo maana it’s getting too hot and you need something to boost the ozone layer or else kila mtu atakufa. When pitching your idea ongeza vitisho kidogo chini ya maji how when nothing is going to be done mambo itaharibika, middle class haogopa kifo wataachia nani hii raha yote? They will do anything to help you. Kwa team yenu na on your website. Make sure you have a Kenyan, a Nigerian who is good with computers , a Caucasian, a Russian, a MuHindi na Lightskin lady ako na shape ya Natalie Tewa to handle PR. Then in the team one of you should be a very good public speaker ata heri mlipe a professional Kama Burale to handle. Such issues. Alafu siku ya presentation make sure you back everything with videos and PowerPoint presentation alafu inafika mahali the Russian with broken english rushes and comes to emphasize a point. Hiyo kitu humaliza middle class mbaya sana they will sell everything invest in your company. Alafu middle class huwa lazy so when pitching the idea show them how they will be making money kama wameinua miguu wakiWatch Netflix and taking alcohol. Siku ya conference your main speaker ni ule kijana anavaa zile suit za double breast alafu akipeana speech kuna mahali he poses and locks eyes with the wealthy investors to emphasize a point before wandering his eyes to others with less financial muscle. Meeting ikiisha your beautiful Lightskin who handles PR doned in expensive perfume and a miniskirt hugs the male.

Interesting, nitaanzia yangu ya kusave electric&hybrid vehicles

Hehe funny but true