Funny sayings kenyans use to sell second hand cars

Kenyans are known for using all the tricks in the book to sell a second hand car. But some of the tricks are just out of this world. Some are just mere funny like the following:

  1. Lady owner
    This is the most used by car dealers to sell a second hand. Many people believe that a car which has been owned by a lady is likely to be in good condition than one owned by a man. Due to this farce, many dealers have resorted to use it to sell cars to unsuspecting Kenyans. What people dont know is that you are better off buying a car owned by a man that one owned by a woman. Some women are rough drivers and others are just ignorant. You may end up buying a car thats so faulty you will empty your bank account to repair it. Many people believe because women are gentle in life, they extend the same gentleness to the car!

  2. Accident free
    This means a car that has never been involved in an accident before. Just because its accident free it doesnt mean it is in perfect condition. It maybe faultier than a 1953 combine harvester. Watch out!

  3. Clean
    Every car is always clean. I mean I have never seen a dirty car. Unless its been in mud. This to me means the car is just in good condition. Otherwise some cars are just dustier than the Sahara and Kalahari desert combined.

  4. Mhindi owned
    Just because someone of Hindi origin owned it doesnt mean its good. It may be too faulty it may end up being a mkokoteni before you rich town.

  5. Expatriate owned
    This is now the funniest off all. People will brand it the perfect car because its owned by an expatriate who is relocating believing its in good condition. People buy in droves. Hapa unapata umegongwa kuliko vile Ruto amegongwa na Uhunye

hapo kwa accident free unascrutinize body edges na mataa ukipata tofauti unamwonesha alafu unakata 50k kwa price yake anajua hayui

Beste yangu alinunua gari,siku ya kure-paint, alipata filler mixed na rangi tatu, dent wazimu haijuani

ingine you should check wear ya miguu and if all of them are new vamia hio bei yake

Two years ago I bought a locally used car from Mombasa. Gari ilikuwa accident repair, filler inaanguka kila mahali. Ikanisumbua plus some clueless mechanics hapo Voi wakanikula asking for parts after parts… Gari iliishi huko almost 2 months… I was grateful when it eventually reached Nairobi. But I had to change part after part…
Nilitumia gari 3 months nikiwa highway kunanyesha nilishtukia truck mbele yangu… Nikaiingia nyuma design ingine… Airbags zikalipuka engine ikalima diff ya lorry ikabaki na cracks. Bonnet ikajikunja hadi ikanigusa mapua.
Insurance assessor aliandika write-off!
Juzi nikitafuta jalopy ingine huko kwa zukabaga nimeona hiyo Gari inauzwa (taa moja Inakaa different, alloy rims zimebadilishwa wameweka rims zimechoka, wanasema engine iko sawa, )eti clean, accident free, sikuamini macho yangu… Locally used clean cars in Kenya are a scam

Umesahau maneno ya mileage. Watu Wengi hufikiria gari iko na mileage kidogo is better than gari iko na mileage mingi. From experience, I don’t find this as true. As long as una maintain gari yako mzuri, it can serve you as long as you want

Buy and Drive, saa hizo gari ni ya kushtuliwa juu battery imekufa

ile kitu huwa ina ni challenge ni hao mafundi wale wanajua kuweka filler kwa gari imewekwa nose cut au half cut hauwes gundua so if a car looks more newer than miaka yake chunguza zaidi

Ex-GK to imply that it’s been well maintained over the years.

:D:D

beba spark ukienda kunua gari. upige pige kwa random spots other bodywork

dad bought one of those ex gk peugots 2009 hapo…crap never served anyone iko parked till leo after costing him around 150gs remaking sijui engine ya toyota and that crap

Alipata fundi bonobo Mimi ukinipatia hio gari naichangamkia vilivyo with a lesser amount

Others say “Original Paint.” That is a scam.